{"id":10,"date":"2011-04-07T18:18:00","date_gmt":"2011-04-07T18:18:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.spicypeanut.com\/?p=10"},"modified":"2013-01-21T02:59:25","modified_gmt":"2013-01-21T02:59:25","slug":"classwomb","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.spicypeanut.com\/?p=10","title":{"rendered":"Classwomb"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span>Apparently there&#8217;s no link between playing music, reading literature, etc. to the baby in utero and the child&#8217;s success or appreciation of those things.\u00a0<\/span><span><br \/>\n<\/span><br \/>\n<span>But my lesson plan! I had a strict curriculum set up, starting with the philosophy of ontological empiricism, viola lessons, and AP French. And I was going to transmit these lessons through a bullhorn directed at Anne&#8217;s belly, a couple hours a night. All that effort for nothing.\u00a0<\/span><span><br \/>\n<\/span><br \/>\n<span>No matter. We still have time to sink all of our desperate hopes and failed dreams into the child and make her feel guilty as an adolescent that she didn&#8217;t live up to our unspoken expectations. A well-put together regimen of controlled neglect, helicopter parenting, and emotional vacuousness will generate that piano-playing astronaut we&#8217;ve always wanted! I mean, that&#8217;s why we became parents &#8211; we need to explore the solar system, people.<\/span><span><br \/>\n<\/span><br \/>\n<span>Upcoming OB and ultrasound appointments on Friday April 8. We&#8217;ll be counting fingers and toes. Hopefully there will be the best number of them. We&#8217;re looking forward to another great photo shoot of the Spicy Peanut. Stay tuned.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Apparently there&#8217;s no link between playing music, reading literature, etc. to the baby in utero and the child&#8217;s success or appreciation of those things.\u00a0 But my lesson plan! I had a strict curriculum set up, starting with the philosophy of ontological empiricism, viola lessons, and AP French. And I was going to transmit these lessons [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-10","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.spicypeanut.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.spicypeanut.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.spicypeanut.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.spicypeanut.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.spicypeanut.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=10"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/www.spicypeanut.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":33,"href":"http:\/\/www.spicypeanut.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10\/revisions\/33"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.spicypeanut.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=10"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.spicypeanut.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=10"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.spicypeanut.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=10"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}